Do You Ask For What You're Entitled To?

Last night I had a 1:1 deep dive with a client.

She was feeling a bit defeated.

She had a client situation where every time she coached this client, she found it uninteresting, the client wasn’t getting results but was happy to continuing to pay her. 

She had another client that had one session left but kept pushing the boat out (meaning delaying the final session because [INSERT PLETHORA OF REASONS] - child sickness, going on holiday etc etc). Clients often do this because they think it’s going to ‘stretch the value’ - it doesn’t, it keeps you energetically plugged into someone that should be complete. 

She had another client that still had $1,875 to pay to finalise her $5,000 invoice. 

She was feeling a bit vulnerable, a bit pissed off and a bit wobbly.

We got down to it & tidied it up. 

It always comes down to a self love and self worth issue. 

The reason we get coaching is to have someone see what we’re not seeing, no matter how self aware we are, we need to be coached. Especially if we value results and growth. 

The questions that were up for discussion were: 

1. Can I actually ask for what I am entitled to? Money owed, sticking to the original call time arrangement, closing out tabs so new energy can enter. 

    

2. Can I actually have a difficult conversation with this complacent client? Regardless of the outcome, can I openly share with said client the kind of results I get with receptive and willing folks? Can I ask them how they’re feeling and work through it? The working through it may look like closing it out and that is ok. 

Here’s how our conversation began re the client that wasn’t doing the work, wasn’t getting results but was happy to keep paying. 

My client:

“She’s happy, do I just keep going, even though she isn’t my ideal client?” 

Me:

“First of all, how do you know she’s happy, have you actually asked her?”

My client: “No.” 

Me:

“Second of all, if you care about aligned clients, results and coaching people vs being their people pleasing cheerleader, you’ll need to have a conversation with her. 

“How you feel is even more important and you can trust your gut.” 

“I want to make sure you understand this is a coaching relationship not a friendship and you’re here to help deliver an outcome, not be paid to hang out with someone.” 

We did an inventory check, like I do with a lot of my 1:1’s. There were a lot of open tabs, there was a lot of people pleasing energy present, so together, we went through the list, one task at a time and agreed on actions. 

My client finished the call, felt clear and energised and took action right away (my favourite kind of client). 

Fast forward to a couple of hours post call, the results started to roll in:

⛴ She said no to the client that kept trying to prolong the coaching relationship.

💵 She asked for the $1,875 balance to be paid, ASAP. 

Sometimes we just need someone to give us permission to upgrade our standards, boundaries and remind us we can ask and follow up on what we’re entitled to. 

We get bitter, irritable and fall victim in the drama triangle when we give our power away vs neutralising the ask. 

Oh, P.S. -

Here’s to,

Brooke’s website: https://brookenolly.com/

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