Do You Get Socially Anxious?

Hey

Let’s talk about social anxiety.

I think social anxiety only exists in two settings.

1. You are completely out of alignment with the people in this social setting/work environment and you’d need to abandon your beliefs, values and opinions to ‘fit’. We know from Brene Brown’s work that fitting in is the opposite of belonging.

2. You are wanting to impress these people so you think you need to be a specific version of yourself in order to ‘fit’ when really, unless you’re your whole self, you are not going to feel connected and that’s what we’re all after at the end of the day.

Brene Brown says:

“Fitting in is about assessing a situation and becoming who you need to be to be accepted. Belonging, on the other hand, doesn't require us to change who we are; it requires us to be who we are.”

May we all accept and love ourselves into belonging and connection over fitting in and people pleasing.

This is the entire ethos of Messy Action as a company.

If you find yourself people pleasing or defaulting to the ‘fitter innerer’ version of yourself, you may want to mix in a different place, space or group of folks. I know it can feel overwhelming, especially when you can’t see what the other side will be like yet.

Let me know if this landed 🛬

Here’s to…

P.S. You may enjoy the podcast episode I did on toxic people, leaving relationships and the drama triangle. You can listen below.