What's moving you away from who you're trying to become?

Hey

How to combat resistance so you can feel proud of yourself.

Excuses. Resistance. Fear. Avoidance. Overwhelm.

They all hang out in the same boat 🛥

I’ve made it my mission over the last 6+ years to understand what makes people so damn avoidant, so damn fearful, so overwhelmed, so indecisive and so perfectionist. What keeps them stuck living the same life month in, month out, even though they know they desperately want to change. 

It all comes down to a lack of support, not just support from anyone but a lack of support from people that live how these people want to live, make the kind of money these people want to make and hold true the kind of values these people want to adhere to. 

In short, they’re not around aligned people for aligned growth and evolution.

We all know the age old saying ‘you are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with’. 

I’d also say ‘you are the average of the people you’re not willing to say no to and/or let go of’. 

There’s a constant internal fight with your innate values system until you realise that those who move you further away from who you are trying to become are not going to be part of your future. 

The longer you delay, the more conflicted, overwhelmed, confused, resistant and fearful you’ll become. 

Let me clarify. I have been a recovering (like seriously in deep recovery) people pleaser my entire life. I have had people in my life that thought we were the best of friends and I felt very little connection when I was around them, I just had no idea I wasn’t obligated to be nice, hang out or accommodate them. 

I grew up being told that I had to be nice to people, be a good girl, be friendly, be liked. 

I have spent much of my adult life isolating myself as I have found it so difficult to say no to people that aren’t a values fit for who I am and what I care about.

I didn’t actually embody the essence of ‘my life, my choice’ because I didn’t even know how to or that I even could. 

A lot of expensive therapy, coaching, books, spaciousness and writing has helped me strengthen a truly atrophied muscle and I continue to be a work in progress. 

When you feel supported by a coach and/or therapist that validates you and gives you permission to walk away from places and people you know aren’t for you, your life becomes more your own, piece by piece, boundary by boundary. 

The more your life becomes your own, the more messy action you’re willing to take because you’ve moved closer toward who you were always meant to be. 

Authenticity is the only true marker for success, the rest is smoke, mirrors, noise and short lived satisfaction. 

Here’s to…

P.S. - Have you listened to this podcast episode 👇🏼

Brooke’s website: https://brookenolly.com/

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