When I'm Scared & Anxious I Do This...

A friend recently shared she is booked up to September with pet sits all over the world. She shared how it’s free accommodation and often in lovely homes. 

I’ve been in the US and Europe since May 8th and I pondered the idea of doing this. 

My brain: 

“It saves on astronomical rent prices”

“It gives you an opportunity to explore places you haven’t seen” 

“Pets are cute” 

“It creates predictability in advance” 

I had a moment of fear, overwhelm, anxiety and “am I making the right decision re how I am living my life right now” about 6 weeks ago. 

For context, I am going all in on my dream of moving my entire life to the US. It’s a long and unpredictable road but I have wanted it for the past 9 years. 

When I am anxious, my brain goes into ‘problem solving-doer mode’. When I can’t see a certain solution or predict how the future will play out my ego brain wants to create certainty and safety ASAP. 

It was 11pm at night, I signed up via the link my friend sent me and I browsed these pet sits. 

Within a couple of days I’d secured a 12 day stint in Stamford, Connecticut and a month long sit on the beach an hour from Sydney. 

Deep down it felt wrong for me. 

It didn’t feel aligned. 

I didn’t want to do it. 

It felt like what people do when they don’t trust they can afford the life they want.

I kept delaying the inevitable cancelation of these sits which resulted in even MORE anxiety around letting people down and not honouring my commitments (a big value of mine). 

Eventually, I let both parties know I wouldn’t be doing the sits. 

I did give reasonable notice but couldn’t shake the feeling of letting them down when I’d said I would do it. 

The reason I’m sharing this story is because it has a lot to do with making decisions when you’re scared, afraid, anxious and overwhelmed vs making decisions rooted in feeling your emotions and letting the fear pass. 

We crave certainty and safety as a species which often leads to fear based decisions that leave us feeling deflated and lacking confidence in our ability.

I made a fear based decision and dealt with the consequences of not living in alignment with my values. 

Excellent lesson learned. 

Sleeping on things, giving things time and making decisions when you’ve had a day or so to really feel into it works a treat and is something my previously traumatised brain is forever re-learning. 

When I am living in alignment with my values and with my personal sense of faith I don’t care about… 

“predictability in advance”

“exploring places I haven’t seen”

“astronomical rent prices”

“certainty”

Because I know that when I live in accordance with what I want, what I value and what feels true, even if I have ZERO idea how it will work out…

life always rewards my bravery.

Life also rewards me when I close loops. 

Saying no to the house sits = closing loops. 

Doing what I know is best for me whilst having no idea how it’ll work out = closing fear loops. 

Taking messy action that is in alignment with my values = closing loops. 

Misaligned closed loops lead to aligned-fresh-new opportunities that just feel better.

So… 

Journal Prompts for you

1. What loops have you got open that lead to anticipatory anxiety? 

2. What do you need to close out right now?

3. Where could you have a little faith that it’ll work out in your favour? 

Let me know if this resonated for you

Wanna explore working together? Book a 1:1 call below ⬇️

Here’s to…

Brooke’s website: https://brookenolly.com/

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